Over the years I’ve not only witnessed my own family dealing with a loved one having epilepsy, but I’ve had to privilege to witness other families coping with the same or similar situation.
Some families cope better than others, that much is surely obvious.
While some rally around their loved one and visit during every hospital trip, some become more distant and may never step foot in a hospital or even view their loved one during postictal phase.
Some go out of their way to learn seizure specific first aid and some will argue they already know what to do or know that there’s nothing to do after a seizure.
Some families become divided with some members fully supporting their loved one and others picking fights with others among the family.
As I’ve witnessed this, I’ve also witnessed the origins of these behaviours.
Sometimes what can seem like positive and supportive behaviours are actually toxic and overbearing. While some behaviours may seem distant and cold it actually just comes from a place of fear and not knowing what to do.
I share this as to say, please be cautious when making assumptions and comments based on what you have or have not seen. You may see great support while your loved one may feel trapped. You may see lack of support while your loved one feels fine as is. Maybe, instead, ask how you can be of better support yourself.
Great advice!! Thank you! My husband always tells me that he hates how his Dad won’t come and support us at the hospital when our son has a very bad day (not that he can now with COVID), but this makes so much sense!!! I’m sure he feels uncomfortable not knowing how to help or what he can do!
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